DIY Sex: Hot Tips for Self-Pleasure
DIY Sex: Hot Tips for Self-Pleasure
On the internet it's all about Do-It-Yourself phenomenon and as fantastic as some of the latest homemade crafts and edible gifts may be, I cannot think of a better project to work on with your very own hands than a little self-pleasure.
With new research suggesting that over 90 per cent of men and women have made solo sex a part of their erotic repertoire, there is hope that the days of shame, stigma and shameful hairy palm myths are long gone. Considering that most people will experience their very first orgasm at the hands of...their own hands, it’s a good thing too! Read on for my favourite tips to get the most out of self-love.
Thinking about someone other than the love of your life during sex is NOT tantamount to cheating. In fact, 84 per cent of men and women admit to fantasizing about other partners and research suggests that those who fantasize have the most fulfilling sex lives. So go ahead and let your mind wander a little...
If you don’t know what to fantasize about, do a little research. Check out the stories from real women in Nancy Friday’s My Secret Garden or pick up a copy of Sweet Love: Erotic Fantasies for Couples by Violet Blue. Not every story will appeal to you in its entirety (in fact, some may turn you off altogether), but reading a variety of fantasies will help you to tap into your own and push your boundaries.
Did you know that most of the noise we make during sex is actually for our partners’ pleasure and not our own? And though we tend to exaggerate our sounds during partnered sex, many of us do the opposite during solo sex. Downplaying our natural vocalizations seems to make sense since many of us were conditioned to muffle our sounds during early masturbation experiences to avoid “getting caught”.
However, as adults, all that has changed. We can lock ourselves in our rooms or steam up the shower as we let it all hang out! The next time you decide to play with yourself, allow your sounds to flow freely so that your breath follows in a deep and natural rhythm. If you feel like sighing, screaming or grunting, then go ahead and indulge. Your body will thank you with orgasmic contractions and tingly sensations all over.
Lube may be a mainstay of all good sex advice, but when it comes to getting wet during masturbation the slippery stuff is just the beginning. Using running water to titillate your most sensitive parts can also awake your senses and spread orgasmic energy throughout your entire body. If you don’t have a detachable shower head, take a warm bath and use a cup to create cascades of cool water over your hottest erogenous zones.
Our sexual bucket lists always seem to include sex in some exotic or public place, so why not apply the same concept to solo sex? Take a quick break mid-day and get off on the thrill of getting caught or simply move from the bed to the couch allowing your technique to be inspired and changed by new surroundings.
Sex researchers have found that couples who experiment with several positions during sex report higher levels of satisfaction and it’s no surprise since varied positions allow us to focus sensations on different parts of our genitals. So why not try out a few new positions to change up your self-pleasure routine and to discover new hot spots (like the A-Spot) you didn’t even know existed.
If you usually masturbate on your back, flip over and reap the rewards of using your body weight to create heavy friction. If you tend to use your right hand, change it up and try out your left one. A little experimentation can go a long way!
Vibrators, dildos, sleeves and lube are the perfect partners that enhance arousal, heighten orgasms and ask for nothing in return. Though not designed to replace a human partner, research shows that using sex toys and lube is linked to higher levels of desire, arousal, orgasm and sexual satisfaction. Woohoo!
Just like partnered sex, solo sex is better when preceded by some sort of build-up or seduction. And though sending yourself roses or chocolates every time you plan to get funky with yourself may be a little much, a little indulgence, pampering and foreplay can take your self-pleasure to new heights.
Think about ways to rile yourself up for a heated self-pleasure session before you make it home. Get in the mood early in the day by wearing a new sexy pair of panties or shamelessly flirting with your office crush. If erotica is your thing, read a sexy story or sneak a peek at a hot video during your lunch break to drag your mind into the gutter if even for a few brief minutes. The power of sexual teasing and anticipation knows no limits.